Czech Republic


There are some damn beautiful women here— definitely not what I expected to find behind the former Soviet Union’s “iron curtain”. Your mission, should you choose to accept it is to find out what’s under that Czech girl’s red dress. Czech it out, Beavis! In the Czech Republic you will find a good variety of YP. There are red-heads, blondes and brunets— all with cool accents who say things like, “Vere are you from? and Vould you like to runkle?” Speaking of accents, I’ll mention now that Prague is really the only city in the Czech Republic where you can find hot, young women who can speak English, and many of them have unbelievable breasts. Now that is a bouncing Czech, I don’t mind!

The problem with the Czech Republic is that it is full of joker, want-to-be-flower-children, never-worked-a-day-in-my-life, I-want-to-go to Prague-and-find-myself Americans who moved here when Communism fell in 1989 following the revolution that took place here. They were drawn by the high standard of living at a low price and haven’t left since. They call themselves YAP’s for Young Americans in Prague—though Young Aimless Faggophiles might be more appropriate. Fortunately, these guys haven’t totally ruined the image some Czech chicks have of foreign men, yet. But they are damn close, especially since these so called match maker agencies popped up here following the Soviet occupation, as they did in Russia. These agencies offer to find you a Czech or Russian wife for a fee. They actually have whole catalogs full of pictures and biographies of women, who basically will marry any foreign squid to get out of Eastern Europe and be able to live and work in a wealthier western country.

Although things aren’t as cheap as they used to be, Prague has the unique combination of great women and great beer. In fact, most serious beer drinkers will tell you that the beer in the Czech Republic is cheaper and better than anywhere else in the world, even Germany. This in and of itself is enough of a reason to Czech it out. If you like to stand around a bar to drink and hit on beautiful, Eastern European women, you will be as happy as the clam you hopefully will be getting. The best places to go in Prague during the day are the Charles Bridge, Old Town, Jan Hus, Vaclavske nam and Na prikope which are the big pedestrian, entertainment and shopping districts. You may not like this scene if your not into not into that hippie-want-to-be, Generation X crap, but it’s worth a look-see. Prague is a nice-looking city, because it escaped the ravages of WWII and preserved much of its architecture.

Prague’s nightlife is hampered by the fact that many of the clubs here open and close at a blink of an eye depending on what various city officials think of the owner or its clientele, or more accurately, how much the owner is willing to bribe the official to keep him from shutting the club down. Since I’m no^into tie-dye, singing around a campfire, talking about Marx or hitting on ugly American girls (I got enough of that at Harvard), many of Prague’s YAPpy bars and hangouts just don’t do it for me. Much of Prague’s night life centers on Nam Republiky and Norodni Tr. Try Jam on Stefanikoua, Jo’s Bar on Malostranske Namesto, Slovanska Hospoda on Na prikope or Europa Cafe on Vaclavske Namesti early on. My favorite place to go is the Bunkr on Lodeckra. Therein lies some fine local and foreign booty. Try your luck at Radost FX on Belehradska, a fancy-smantsy club for this part of the world, Lavka on Gula Gula Club on Betlemske nam or the Roxy on Dlouha.

God Damn Factor 8.5

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