Bar and Club Etiquette


Let’s face it. Bars and clubs are traditionally great places to meet beautiful women. Everyone has his own style on how to run sorties on the babes and how to work a room. But no matter what your style you have to be intelligent. Remember the following and you can help branding yourself an idiot in your own eyes;

1) You have to bring some form of media to record the contact information for the women you meet out at bars and clubs. Bring a pen with you when you head out. Write on a napkin or your hand. (You don’t want to make it too obvious that you expected to meet a lot of women that night by bringing a little black book or something.) Don’t lose a chick to follow up because you didn’t bring anything to write with and were forced to errantly memorize her phone number or address. Now with the advent of smart phones, just “bump” her with your iPhone, or get her to text you her contact info. It’s way cooler than the old fashioned way of scribbling something on a napkin, which isn’t cool to do anymore if you are an under 65yo PB.

2) When traveling abroad, don’t forget the name, address and phone number of where you are staying so you can tell the girls you meet out at the bars and clubs that information. Jot it down in the piece of junk throw away mobile phone you bought for the trip abroad, or better yet, bring business cards for the place you are staying with you and give her one.

3) Don’t sit in the corner of the bar where you can’t get to the girls. Stand in high traffic areas— by the door, the bathroom, the stairs or on a walkway. Remember this general rule of thumb; Girls who sit huddled in corners talking in private to their friends generally don’t want to be bothered. Those in high traffic areas looking around, checking out all the scrubadickin’ cock-blockin’ PB’s generally do.

4) Be conscious of body language. Persistence pays off a lot of the time when chasing the girl of your dreams, but be able to tell when you are wasting your time. Know when to move on and when to give it that extra effort. Does the girl seem like she’s into you, but her nervousness keep her from being more open? Does she seem to like you, but wants to spend time with the people she came with? Does she have the middle finger of one hand extended to you and a can of mace in the other? Think people.

5) Make intelligent decisions. For example; Sometimes you have to choose between trying to feel out an entire group of girls or concentrating on one in the group. Sometimes you have to choose between working on the girl you like or working on the girl who likes you. Choose wisely. You are going to make mistakes. It’s inevitable. But you can minimize them, if you’re intelligent.

6) Carry some cigarettes or a lighter with you when you go out to bars, even if you don’t smoke. Almost every bar-going, disco-hopping girl in the world smokes or is with friends who do. It’s an easy way to meet chicks, and to stunt the growth of their fetuses if you accidentally get them pregnant. If she doesn’t smoke, alcohol is a damn good substitute!

7) Girls who frequent bars in big vacation destinations (like the Greek Islands, the Costa del Sol, Argentine beach towns and American spring break hot spots) are almost always easier to hit on. They’re away from home, their parents and their boyfriends. They’re probably in a good mood and much more likely to do things they wouldn’t otherwise do normally. I.E. They are much more likely to runkle a PB like you.

8) Don’t expect the girls to come up to you and initiate the conversation. That kind of thing only happens in the mid-Western United States and occasionally in Scandinavia. They almost never do, even if they really, really want to. You have to strap one on and run the sortie, if you want to meet the girl.

9) Generally it is much easier to approach a woman when she is alone. So take advantage of the opportunity when she is, even if it’s only for a moment. If she is in a big group you not only have to win her over, but in general you have to win the approval of all her friends, a much more difficult task, especially with potential Mother Theresa’s lurking everywhere.

10) Don’t scam on chicks with a shitty wingman. There is nothing worse than missing out on a runkle because your buddy is acting like a moron. It’s happened to me on more than one occasion. Alternatively, if your wingman is being a douche, try playing the good cop, bad cop thing. Go it alone if need be.